Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

When a dog smells another dog’s poo or wee, do they then remember that scent for when they smell it again, or even further know which dog they are smelling if they know the dog?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Why are Democrats deflecting and aren’t as tough on Hunter Biden with all of his criminal activity and his rising possibility of him receiving a charge for illegally owing a gun?

I have a reading level above third grade

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I see through liars

States With the Most Generous Tippers - Newser

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I Used to Dread Taking Creatine—Then I Found These Gummies - The Daily Beast

I can read

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

What are your views on music video reactors on YouTube?

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I can count

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Hackers take aim at Washington Post journalists in an apparent ‘targeted’ cyberattack - CNN

I actually pay taxes

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Could some kind lady post me a photo of her hairy spread pussy? It has become extremely difficult to find new amateur photos and I would be infinitely grateful.

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Why are there so many illegal Haitians in Ohio? They can't walk here. Democrats flew them here to cause chaos and crime in Ohio.

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Do older women know what they want?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

How can I get a girlfriend? I am 26.

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Israel says Iran was racing toward a bomb. US intelligence says it was years away - CNN

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I have complete contempt for traitorism

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Why do I want to be caught sucking dick by my wife?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Are there girls here who like group sex?

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand how hurricane paths work

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity